4 Lies That Hold You Back

Do you ever feel like you have to live up to everyone else’s expectations, do everything perfectly, or keep it all together even when you’re falling apart inside? If you’ve nodded yes to any of that, I want you to lean in close and hear this truth:

Those are lies—and it’s time to stop believing them.

Jesus said in John 8:32, “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” It’s time for you to walk in that freedom.

Far too many women spend years—sometimes even decades—believing things about themselves that were never true in the first place. Lies whispered by culture, family, fear, or their own inner critic. But you were never meant to live a life shaped by lies. You were created for truth, for purpose, and for freedom in Christ.

Here are four of the most common lies women believe—and the scriptural truths that will set you free.

Lie #1: “I am who I’m going to be.”

Also known as: “You can’t teach an old dog new tricks.” Or, “It’s too late for me.”

Sound familiar?

Here’s the truth: God is not done with you. Not by a long shot.

I’m living proof. I was a trial attorney, then a judge, then ran a women’s ministry, a nonprofit, and started a coaching business—all after turning 60. I’m currently working on launching my paper product line because God is still writing my story.

Your age is not a limitation. Your past does not disqualify you. The only thing holding you back is the belief that you’re stuck.

Philippians 1:6 reminds us, “Being confident of this, that He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.”

If you’re still breathing, God is still building.

Lie #2: “Someday.”

“Someday I’ll start the ministry.”

“Someday I’ll write the book.”

“Someday I’ll step into my purpose.”

But for too many women, “someday” turns into “never.”

There’s a war between the life you’re living and the life you were created for—and in the middle of that war is something called resistance. Resistance wears a lot of disguises: perfectionism, fear of failure, fear of criticism, fear of change. And it’ll convince you to delay your dreams indefinitely.

But God’s Word calls us to live fully and wisely now.

Psalm 90:12 says, “Teach us to realize the brevity of life, so that we may grow in wisdom.”

You don’t have to wait for the perfect moment—it rarely comes. Take one dream off the “someday” shelf today. Start small. Start scared. Just start.

As Dr. Wayne Dyer said, “Don’t die with the music still in you.” That gift you’ve been sitting on? It’s meant to be shared.

Lie #3: “I’d like to, but…”

This one sounds so practical. So reasonable. But it’s often just another way we hold ourselves back.

“I’d like to start a business, but I don’t have time.”

“I’d like to write a book, but I don’t know how.”

“I’d like to serve, but I’m not equipped.”

I remember when I felt God was nudging me to leave my career behind and start an online ministry for women. My first thought? “I’d like to, but I don’t know how.” I wasn’t tech-savvy. I had no clue how to run anything online.

But God didn’t ask me to have all the answers. He asked me to say yes—and then He sent help: a mentor, an assistant, and all the guidance I needed to take the next step.

Hebrews 12:1 encourages us to “lay aside every weight… and run with endurance the race that is set before us.”

The phrase “I’d like to, but…” is a weight you were never meant to carry. Let it go. Replace it with, “I’m going to, so…” and watch your confidence grow.

Lie #4: “I don’t have the resources I need.”

This lie will stop you before you even start.

We think we need more time, more money, more energy, more support—when the truth is, most of the time, we already have enough to take the first step.

God specializes in doing more with less. Start where you are with what you have—and trust God to meet you in the middle.

My own family history reminds me of this. When my younger brother did an ancestry test, we learned our roots trace back to Benin. My grandfather—born the first free man in our family—faced discrimination as a soldier in World War I. Yet he came home, bought a logging truck, and built a business. He did what he could with what he had.

And so can you.

Because when you’re walking in your God-given purpose, you are never without provision.

Philippians 4:19 declares, “And my God will supply every need of yours according to His riches in glory in Christ Jesus.”

God is your Source. He is Jehovah Jireh—the Lord who provides. Whether He supplies directly, through others, or through unexpected opportunities, you can trust Him to show up.

The Truth That Sets You Free

If any of these lies have taken up residence in your heart, it’s time to evict them. Replace them with God’s truth. Because what you believe about yourself will either build you up or keep you stuck.

You are not too old. You do not have to wait. You are not without options. You are not lacking.

You are a beautiful, capable, extraordinary woman, created on purpose for a purpose.

And when you start to believe that, you’ll begin to live it.

Freedom. Fulfillment. Flexibility. These are the rewards of walking in truth and trusting God with your steps.

So today, ask Him to guide you, give you wisdom, and help you walk fully into the woman He created you to be.

The world needs what He placed inside you. Don’t keep it waiting.